1. How to max out the life in a floral gift arrangement the same way I max out the life in me.
2. How to say, “I’m feeling better every day,” even when that is at best a well-intentioned fib.
3. How to smile and mean it when folks who never really cared much for my big-mouthed self suddenly can’t stop singing the praises of feisty li’l ol’ me.
4. How to ride the pain meds coaster without getting caught too long in the whirl.
5. How to live in anticipation of another shoe dropping.
6. How to count my blessings when the numbers don’t feel particularly high – the secret being to pay close, close, close attention until one, then another and another pops into view.
7. How to detect the perfume of compassion on the slightest breeze because all I have to do is sniff in the right direction and it will be there.
8. How to be scared and know there will be a fearless moment ahead somewhere sometime somehow.
9. How to accept. How to accept. How to accept.
10. How to see the angels all around, including the one in the mirror, ready to let me hitch a ride between their wings.
Composed in great gratitude for what looks like a successful surgical procedure on May 28, and in greatest gratitude to all of you who prayed this outcome into being. Though we won’t know for absolutely certain until June 9, one day before I wing eastward to rendezvous with an angel assemblage like no other (The International Women’s Writing Guild Conference, June 12 to 19, at Skidmore College in Saratoga Springs, New York, where I will be presenting a writing workshop inspired by my experiences during the past year-and-a-half most appropriately titled “There Had to Be Angels.”) Would you care to come along? Call (212) 737-7536. You’ll be oh so glad you did!
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6 comments:
HUZZAH!!! I am so glad you will be with us - in every sense of the word.
Love,
Leiah
I love your writing- and I adore your candid honesty. This post made me smile- and made me realize how much I've learned about myself from my experience as a caregiver for someone with cancer.
Thank You for sharing it- all of it...from one "big-mouth" to another, it's good to hear it a big voice. :)
I didn't know I was holding a part of my breath in until I read your posting. Relief...
I really loved the comment after your last posting, about the handout someone still had from one of your workshops at Skidmore, about the definition of a heroine. Not only are you the heroine of your own story but you're assuring us, by your own actions and words, that all of us are (even when we don't think so).
And by the way, that "tough, big-mouth self" (or whatever words you used) wasn't at all so bad. You always projected confidence, intelligence, a willingness to share your knowledge with sister writers and a very fine sense of humor. I think I was in awe of you. These are not traits to be taken lightly. In fact, the last one mentioned has probably helped you quite a bit on this rough part of your life-journey.
Keep healing!
XXXOOO-- and a big hug when you get to Saratoga, Marilyn
Oh I like that one ... count your blessings when the number doesn't appear to be too high.
How good to hear your words, Alice, an in your own voice.
I am so relieved to hear.
(A friend in Seattle (Nora), who had surgery at the same site some years ago, did healing work for you yesterday. I will forward your blog to her.) I am so glad Skidmore is in the plan,, for your sake as well as ours. I fly to Seattle on United after Skidmore. Let me know if we should coordinate taxis or times.
Rest well, evs
Alice, I really look forward to seeing you again at IWWG this summer! How, that is grandÃsimo! Love, Heidi
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